The Detective Pikachu Pokémon Cards Are Here And They’re Awful

So we all know that there’s going to be a new Pokémon movie called Detective Pikachu, starring none other than our favourite actor, Ryan Reynolds.

Obviously, with this release there is an opportunity to sell merch. The most obvious thing? Pokemon cards.

Well, the design of the cards has been revealed and they’re hideous. But also kind of great. It’s hard to gauge.

Similar to the Nintendo 3DS game of the same name, the story follows a Pikachu who can mysteriously be understood by one boy, and their quest to solve some seriously weird goings-on in the world of Pokemon.

In the trailer we’ve gotten a sneak peek of some of the most iconic characters in Pokemon – and some of the creepiest.

Here’s each Pokemon in all their furry/3D/live-action/uncanny valley glory…

Pikachu:

It’s called Detective Pikachu so obviously we’d be seeing our favourite yellow guy. Not everyone expected to see him in this form though and it’s a little…jarring.

Jigglypuff

…no comment.

Greninja

One of the better-looking Pokemon who really sort-of suits the live-action treatment.

Mr. Mime

This one is a straight-up no from me.

Charizard

Not too many complaints for Charizard, but he’s still a little…fluffy?

Psyduck

Hopefully less annoying that the anime version, amiright?

Bulbasaur

Personally, Bulbasaur looks spot-on for me. Plus he doesn’t have the weird frog-walk that everyone freaked out about earlier this year. 10/10.

Morelull

A pretty sneaky spot here – see them? Next to the Bulbasaur? Hopefully we’ll get more detail in the actual movie.

Comfey, Braviary, Flabébé, Pidgeotto

A quadruple spot. There’s some debate on whether that’s a Pidgey or Pidgeotto – I’m going with the latter (sorry).

Dodrio

It’s smaller than I expected…

Charmander

Also a stove. Useful! But still fluffy? Why?! Surely that’s a fire hazard…

Bouffalant

Another blurry spot, but another classic Pokemon. Not literally of course, it’s not a Gen One, but you know what I mean.

Rufflet

Squirtle

More of an Easter egg than an appearance, at least Squirtle looks decidedly not-furry.

Pancham

Joltik

Venusaur

Definitely not to scale.

Audino

Emolga

And that’s it – for now. Did you spot any Pokemon we missed? Check out the trailer below and let us know!